If you believed that swinging came without any rules because all couples simply go with the flow, then that’s not quite right. There is a certain etiquette to follow. Otherwise, you might discover that you are no longer welcome at events or parties because your reputation stands out. The rules can differ from one event to another, so it’s worth exploring them before agreeing to attend an event. In the Netherlands people don’t bat an eyelid, everyone is very open here," Cate said. “Sexuality and nudity isn’t a big deal." Plus, there are plenty of people looking to find other swingers on here, making it a great all-around option. Kenzie, who started swinging with her husband to meet new people after losing touch with old friends, also recommends watching some porn or reading erotica together. "That gives you a conversation starter" about what you each liked (and didn’t like) about it. Anything that gets you talking about what you might want and what you might not want is a good idea. According to Cate, many schoolteachers in the US have lost their jobs and in custody battles an individual’s swinging status could be used as a "weapon against them".

John and I love each other, and we have built a relationship in which we coexist harmoniously. The unique nature of our relationship and the memories we have created together can never be replicated by or with another person. It was then that John told me about the world of swinging. He explained to me what it was and how it worked. Like most, I was baffled that such a community existed. I started reading up and educating myself about the world of swinging. I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t intrigued.Perhaps surprisingly, sex with others was not our priority: for us, it’s about building community. We’ve made some of our closest friends at swingers events, and we hoped that after a week of cruising, that number would grow. The key to successful swing lifestyle is to ensure you manage your expectations before attending any event. Walking into an event with no expectations could leave you facing some awkward situations. You’re not guaranteed anything when attending a swingers event, and it’s important to remember this. There might not be any couples suitable for you, or you might not be suitable for other couples. Therefore, managing expectations when adopting a swing lifestyle is crucial. Let Your Woman Fly the Flag In fact, plenty of our fellow cruisers don’t even identify as swingers or non-monogamous. They just appreciate the opportunity to take a luxury vacation with non-judgmental, sex-positive people who hold space for them. I said as long as he could get me showered and out the door in time for my second date with the muscle-bound guy from Thursday, then he was welcome to have me. Safety first. Make sure the people throwing the party have enforceable no-tolerance and policies and consent monitors.

While my partner relaxed by the pool getting to know a new lady friend, I ran into a man who asked to join me in my room for some playtime. Swinging Tip: Don’t be turned off by SwingLifestyle’s old-school look. Give it a try and you may be pleasantly surprised. For example, I would not recommend trying soft swinging to fix problems in the relationship or if one partner is doing it to please the other. Warning: As you’d expect, this week’s diary features some explicit details about sex, so it’s definitely NSFW. Monday Got a question about sex that you're too embarrassed to ask? In the online sex misinformation crisis, getting accurate and reliable answers about sex is more difficult than ever before. Mashable is here to answer all your burning sex questions — from the weird and wonderful, to the graphic and gory. Think of us as your sexy agony aunts.I would never recommend swinging to anyone, but neither would I tell them to stay away from it. Every relationship is unique, and it’s entirely up to the individuals involved to figure out what works best for them. The pleasure on his face was palpable as we gave him a blowjob together, as was the pleasure on ours when he took turns going down on us. The session ended with him taking her from behind while burying his fingers in me, leaving all of us sweaty and breathless. Swinging Tip: Be prepared for people who are super ready to get down to business. If that isn’t what you’re after, then you may want to look elsewhere. Few writers/directors seem to have had the courage or interest to explore ‘swinging’ seriously, in all its shades of grey. Here are some of the main films in the genre…